The first paragraph of a story I’m working on. Please feel free to give me your thoughts.
“Your application has been reviewed, and we are regretful to inform you that you have been unsuccessful. We wish you buckets of luck with all of your future applications. Have a good day, sir”
AJ pulled his left hand down from its resting place on his left cheek, made a fist, and slowly and sarcastically hit downwards on to the surface of his oak home office table as if he was really very angry. He was angry, but also tired, so he lacked the true energy needed to actually bottom-fist strike the table. AJ was creeping up on four months without a job, his reserves of money drying up at a seemingly exponential rate. By best reckoning, AJ mapped out in his head the figure of 61 dollars and 6 cents and the way in which that figure could be stretched over the next seven days. “Hmm, I believe I have 8 dollars and 8 cents per day for seven days” AJ said, he said it out loud too because he was honestly impressed and surprised with himself and his impromptu mathematical ability. AJ judged that smoking a cigarette would be a good idea, a known stress reliever; AJ went out into his garage, took a seat on plastic garden chair and lit up one of what AJ would sometimes jokingly call “cancer candles”. Bluish grey smoke made interesting shapes and flowing movements towards the garage ceiling, and AJ sat back and watched the smoke show. For a brief moment the stress of finding a new job was dissolved. Then AJ had to but his cigarette out, get back inside and return to his computer screen and its constant digital reminder, “You have no job!” might as well have been watermarked over every webpage he visited. One in the morning plus a very tired AJ equalled the thought of bed in AJ’s head. He complied with this equation and dawdled off to bed.