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Getting In Shape

Spurred on by nobody more than my own team, The aptly named Spurs; their great performances in the Premier League and my own desire to start playing soccer again with full force, my lack of energy, lack of creativity, lack of good skin and many other things, I am endeavouring to get in shape once again, this time it’s personal!

Back in High School, before I started drinking, I was in the best shape of my life, I did gymnastics (I could bench press more than the big rugby players at my school, even though I never lifted weights really, just did bodyweight exercises), and I was in the best shape of my life. I didn’t smoke or drink, not even caffeine back then. I slept like a log every night. And I want to feel like that again.

Here’s how I’m going to do it;

The Rocky 4 routine (roughly);

  1. I shall avoid lifting weights in a static gym-like environment, rather I will lift and move heavy things in a dynamic way thereby engaging all support muscles, not just the pecs that a bench press works, I’ll do the old backpack full of rocks then go hiking or chopping wood or doing some indoor rock climbing etc. These things are much more fun that lifting weights in a gym, and they work many more muscles, tendons and joints too.
  2. I shall take no supplements or protein powders or any of that shit, it’s very bad for the liver, and my liver is probably in trouble already. Just good protein from salmon, nuts, dairy etc. One of my friends is a hardcore weight-lifter, he takes all the supplements in the world, he even dabbled in illegal steroids at one point, he also often takes an amphetamine-type pill before his workouts (this is a very popular thing weightlifters do, can’t imagine why, your fucking heart could explode if you’re deadlifting 300 kilograms AND high on speed! lol)
  3. Good old fashioned bodyweight exercises like gymnasts do to build mass AND strength – Pushups, hindu squats, dips, chin-ups, parallel ring work (very tricky to do, but worth it when you get the hang of it), isometrics (like sitting against a wall for as long as you can) and that sort of thing.

This is not me – but yes, I used to look like this in High School. Now I look like Daniel Radcliffe or some other skinny dude!

4. And most importantly, I shall begin playing soccer again, starting off at the amatuer level I suppose. Great cardio, soccer is, you’re just running for 90 minutes straight! haha. It will also keep my mental sharpness at an optimum level – soccer is the most cerebral team sport in the world, it’s an improvised musical jam on a playing field, basically.

5. Cheat days??? No no no, there are no cheat days. Getting lightly drunk on a Saturday and eating KFC on your ‘cheat day’, is counterproductive and should never be done if you’re really focused on getting fit!

Toodle oo! 🙂



19 thoughts on “Getting In Shape

  1. Good for you! Invest in yourself, it’s good medicine for your soul.

    Posted by insanitybytes22 | January 13, 2016, 3:12 pm
  2. OMG. Dang those guys are hot! XD What’s wrong w KFC? 🙂

    Posted by gh0stpupp3t | January 13, 2016, 3:36 pm
    • Lol, KFC is gross (although their mashed potato with pepper-heavy gravy is something heavenly, but greasy chicken with rat faeces in there (sometimes lol), but alcohol was the key thing really – there is no safe level of alcohol new studies show. I love me a big cheesy pizza, and I will most likely eat more than one of them in the coming weeks! haha
      Those guys are gymnasts, pound for pound the strongest athletes on Earth – I used to be one…..but you know….life happened….and I lost all that muscle, still have the chest hair though!

      Posted by sarcasticgoat | January 13, 2016, 3:41 pm
      • LOL I prefer McDs myself. I weighed myself today 170 lbs.

        Posted by gh0stpupp3t | January 13, 2016, 3:44 pm
      • Oh god, McDonalds is the WORST! Their burgers are flat as a piece of paper, they don’t even put the sesame seeds on the buns anymore, those used to be the healthiest thing on those burgers!
        But, McDonalds chips (fries) are unbelievably good, I’ll give you that.
        Why not stop into a real deli, where they cut the meat right in front of you, and they give you exactly the right amounts of what you want? Sure you pay a bit more, but not only is it healthier, but it tastes SOOOOO much better! I’m drooling right now, thinking of a real deli salami, cheese and tomato sandwich! Goddam!

        Posted by sarcasticgoat | January 13, 2016, 3:53 pm
      • 170 pounds is 77 kilograms – that’s perfectly within the normal range?

        Posted by sarcasticgoat | January 13, 2016, 3:58 pm
      • Yepp. 🙂 Thank you. ❤

        Posted by gh0stpupp3t | January 13, 2016, 11:40 pm
  3. I love your functional approach to working out! Sometimes people who lift weights every day forget about things like balance and flexibility and other things that are important in daily life.

    Posted by thebikinibookworm | January 13, 2016, 3:37 pm
  4. Hahaha!! We don’t have any epic American restaurants in Canada. We should. I think in Barrie there is a Papa Johns but Barrie is too far away. 😦 I want a Sonic restaurant near us, 🙂

    Posted by gh0stpupp3t | January 13, 2016, 5:12 pm
  5. I love Australia. It’s my favorite continent. 🙂 I am in Canada where (finally) we are getting snow.

    Posted by gh0stpupp3t | January 14, 2016, 11:30 pm

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