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Dear Employers (and your obsession with “experience”) – a rant!

Hello employers, ALL employers, of any type, you need to read this damn bloody carefully – – by the way, the rude language I use in this is nothing personal, I’m just very frustrated and quite frankly, at my wits end!

HIRE ME! NOW! RIGHT FUCKING NOW! FOR ANYTHING YOU HAVE AVAILABLE AT ALL!

I don’t care what job it is. I’ll make it a bit easier for by giving you an example – – if you’re a car mechanics shop, I can clean up around the place, or test-drive/deliver/clean the cars, you don’t even have to employ me as a qualified mechanic (which I’m not, although I do know quite a bit about cars). 

I’m not as “experienced” as the guy who studied inside a special building for 3 years, but I’m smart nonetheless! I am creative and original in my thinking. I can seriously deliver you some very thoughtful problem solving ideas.

Okay employers, here’s the thing,

Basically every job ad I’ve read in the paper and online has had a very definitive “experienced persons only apply” part written in it…..and this is for menial jobs like KFC worker, or Retail salesperson etc.

If you need experienced people for these jobs, how do end up employing anybody at all for the positions you have available? Someone on the internet said it best, “You can’t get a job without experience, but you can’t get experience without a job! Dafuq we spozed to do mayan!?”

It’s true though, so here is my advice to all the employers out there,

Don’t be so obsessed with experienced people. This is pure laziness on your part, mostly. Instead, you could actually try to hire some people who aren’t particularly experienced in the exact field that you need them to be experienced in, you’ll find that these “inexperienced” people will find entirely new and unique ways to solve problems that arise within your workplace, trust me. Or better yet, hire completely inexperienced people for your jobs and train them yourselves, this is great for two reasons,

reason 1. you get to train a person into a totally experienced worker. Leaving them with all the skills necessary should they wish to quit that job and move into a near-identical job role somewhere else.

and reason 2. If you train the person successfully and well, then that means that you yourself, as the employer, are great at your job and a nice person too, for taking the time to train the person one-on-one. And it must be a very satisfying feeling to see the young person you trained doing really well in the workplace, knowing that that was YOUR doing.

I’m sorry if this post was overly rude or sarcastic in places, but recently I feel as though the employers of the world have united against me in some way. I haven’t gotten ANY positive responses to my applications and so on and so forth……….whatever, do what you like, employers, you’re clearly superior to me as human beings and I fully understand if you’re all incredibly busy with all your duties. Peace out, hope to be employed by one of you people soon. 😉

Bye.

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