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Another Acrostic (Jesusy Based)

Another one I’m writing now,

Christ Almighty, the fervor seems to grow.

Right now I’m levitating off the ground,

Over my cat who’s looking nervous.

Saturday night it is, or Sunday morning

Today is the day the unbelievers will come for me.

In their hordes, with Dawkins Bibles and lazer guided pitchforks.

Coming now, over the hill, the Dawkinists in their thousands

Petrifying, cold, emotionless, and faces pallid.

Over the hill have come the Dawkinists, running, galloping in their genetically modified bodies!

Electric brains in the skulls of these dopes,

Microprocessors for eyes, they’ve robotized themselves.

Some have the latest software installed, straight off the shelves.

As the Dawkinists approach my floating, heavenly body,

Calamity occurs, because I’m no longer corporeal.

Transcended time and space, I have.

Undergone a massive change like a girl wearing L’Oreal.

Am I become God?

Likely. Very likely.


Y‘all aren’t not damn welcome here, y’all Dawkinists bastards, I proclaim.

And they all drop to their knees, made mostly of space-age polymers.

Right now, the worship me,

Eels I conjure up, for my new minions to feast on.

Nobody can deny my God-like status now,

Over the hill go back, my new minion followers

To spread the word, the word of Me!

As I float around the Universe,

Something comes hurtling into my mind!


Asteroid, it was.

Damn things hurtle around out here

And as my mind is everywhere now,

Sometimes they fly into my mind.

I‘m going off topic, or am I?

The thing is, I can’t concentrate since becoming God.

Hurtling things, moral issues, debates on whether I’m real or not.

Only person I can ask for help is gone, consigned to the God detention centre.

Under pressure, I break in to the centre, to talk to…………..


He was a mate of mine, who abused his powers.

Today I learned a lot. I aint got what it takes to be a God!



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November 2014
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