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Steak Snobs!

Shut up, steak snobs!

I like my steak to be cooked in the style that is known as “well done”.

I don’t want it “bleu” or “rare” or “medium rare”.

I want it to be thoroughly cooked, damn it!

I don’t want my steak to have red juice leaking out of it, that’s fucking gross!

I want it to be all the same colour on the inside, no redness, fuck that!

When I come round your house for dinner, and you flat-out refuse to cook my steak the way I like it, because you’ve watched a few Gordon Ramsey shows and think you know how to cook really well. You say things like, “I wont cook your steak “well done”, because that is a waste of good steak”!

That is fucking madness, people! It’s not a waste of good steak if it’s cooked the way I like it, because I if it is cooked the way I like it, I will actually enjoy it!

If you simply refuse to serve me the steak I like, and rather you serve me a red-on-the-inside steak, I wont eat it, NOW THAT’S A WASTE OF GOOD STEAK!

So, in conclusion………steak snobs can go throw themselves out of a very high window. Then, on the ground below, your splattered body I will cook “well done” just to piss off your dead spirit! Booyah!

Bye.

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Discussion

3 thoughts on “Steak Snobs!

  1. I quite enjoy your take on ‘steak snobs’…I have a few in my life and will begin calling them such. Thank you.

    Posted by tmcoa | October 8, 2014, 5:40 pm
    • You like well cooked steak too?
      I’m pleased to meet another of my kind, I haven’t met many haha 😉

      Posted by sarcasticgoat | October 8, 2014, 5:54 pm
      • Oh no don’t get me wrong…I eat my steak bloody as hell. But I do feel like everyone is entitled to their own choices. Especially when it comes to food!!!

        Plus like who made them steak deity of the universe right?!
        Pfft.

        Posted by tmcoa | October 8, 2014, 6:03 pm

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