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Green Tea

Hey, if it’s good enough for Luis “Bite your body” Suarez, then it’s good enough for me. You see, the Uruguayan wonder-guy and Liverpool goal scoring machine, Luis Suarez, carries around with him everywhere, a special Uruguayan pot looking thing which contains very strong Uruguayan green tea, called ‘mate’.

So, because I’ve been feeling like utter shit recently, both physically and mentally, I too shall drink green tea. Ah yes, the fabled Green Tea – famous for it’s restorative qualities and health giving thingys. I’ve just made myself a green tea, and it’s really more of a browny orange colour, it hasn’t even delivered on the green part of it’s description!

I haven’t added milk or sugar or even cream, or mustard! I left those things out because they apparently mask the true benefits of this famous drink, so it is just a bit of warm water and green tea in a cup. A cup that I’m sure will now be stained browny green for the rest of its cup-life. Ah, the life of a cup……so ful”filling!” That joke was worth it, don’t care what you say!

The taste is something that only a mother could love. Joking, it’s actually not bad. It has hints of green, and even stronger hints of tea! It surely is a super-drink that people mostly drink for its health benefits, because the taste is not what you’d call….fabulous, or refreshingly great.

I’m half way through the tea by now, and lo and behold, the motherfucking tea is getting stronger! This is truly miraculous. A drink that makes you stronger as it itself gets stronger! Fuck me, this is outstanding.

I love this green tea. A very nice alternative to instant coffee, and an even better alternative to Lipton’s Iced Tea, which comes in a bottle at the shops – which just happens to taste like the bathwater of a homeless person with Leprosy.

Anyway, get some green tea in ya! It’s good stuff.




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June 2014
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