I was sitting in a shop one day, a gloomy Saturday evening. The artificial light was hitting me, and it scattered off my body in the most glistening and tempting way. I was minding my own business, just sitting on wood, harmlessly, with a few strange, colorful acquaintances. We weren’t acting strangely, just sitting there, in total silence. When suddenly, a smelly, middle-aged man, picked me up by the neck, and cradled me all the way to his house. He told me how all of my beauty was on the inside. I’m a whisky bottle and this is my destiny.